"In essence we are one,
but in nonsense we are many.
We need essence and nonsense.
Life is for fun;
otherwise
God could have just created everyone
alike
with the same thoughts.
Everything is God's Will.
Nothing happens without His Will.
He allows this chaos.
Why?
He must have thought,
'Only by this chaotic situation
will they really thirst for peace.
Then, if I give them peace,
they will really relish it.'"
- Sri Swami Satchidananda
This is not the way it was supposed to happen.
I was supposed to have the bypass, lose all the weight, have my body lift surgeries and live happily ever after.
I was supposed to use my yearly trip to the Meadowlands Fair as a benchmark to mark my progress from waddling super-obesity to scampering yogini athlete.
That's not how it's unfolding.
I feel like I'm worse off today than I was in 2006 before the surgery.
I'm in a frikken' wheelchair for God's sake!
Hmph. Some benchmark.
My higher self - who peeks down at me through the morass of rumination and expectation I surround myself with - knows there is a higher wisdom to all this.
She knows that I needed to crave the wellness more deeply than I have been.
She knows I needed to seek guidance from higher quality sources than I have been.
So I made it happen.
The craving and the seeking are happening from a wheelchair (for at least another 6 weeks).
That is God's plan.
Seek and you shall find.
Crave and you shall be satisfied.
But the quality of the seeking and the craving determine the quality of the finding and the sating.
I've upped my quality.
My life is taking one of the most positive turns it's ever taken, even more so than in 2006 when I had the surgery.
I'm taking my health to a higher level.
I feel I'm doing it the right way this time.
I wake up in the morning and make my bed.
That's huge, HUGE!
I haven't made my bed since....come to think of it I never made my bed.
Not ever.
As a kid I wasn't allowed to make my own bed because, according to my mother, I wouldn't do it right.
When I was a teenager I left the bed unmade for spite.
When I moved to my own apartment I never made my bed.
Why would I?
I was the only one who was ever in my room.
Who cared if I had an unmade bed?
That unmade-bed habit stayed with me for the past 21 years.
My bed stayed unmade until last Wednesday, May 27th when I began the first phase of my new life habits.
In order to do my morning exercises, my bed needs to be made.
So I've been making my bed.
Nothing fancy.
I'm on crutches when I'm in my apartment so there's no tucking or bouncing a quarter on the taught sheets.
But it's a made bed that people and cats can sit upon.
I like it.
I like the Lisa who makes her bed.
She's cool.
I'm cool.
None of this would be happening the way it's happening if I had not hit rock bottom (again) with this ruptured tendon in my knee.
Thank God I hurt my knee.
*Lisa's Video Pick of the Day*
The Fair is coming!
The Fair is coming!
Here's my favorite attraction.
The sleazy, weird, freaky, cool, old-timey
classic World of Wonders Sideshow with the veteran carny
Ward Hall.
click here or click below
but in nonsense we are many.
We need essence and nonsense.
Life is for fun;
otherwise
God could have just created everyone
alike
with the same thoughts.
Everything is God's Will.
Nothing happens without His Will.
He allows this chaos.
Why?
He must have thought,
'Only by this chaotic situation
will they really thirst for peace.
Then, if I give them peace,
they will really relish it.'"
- Sri Swami Satchidananda
This is not the way it was supposed to happen.
I was supposed to have the bypass, lose all the weight, have my body lift surgeries and live happily ever after.
I was supposed to use my yearly trip to the Meadowlands Fair as a benchmark to mark my progress from waddling super-obesity to scampering yogini athlete.
That's not how it's unfolding.
I feel like I'm worse off today than I was in 2006 before the surgery.
I'm in a frikken' wheelchair for God's sake!
Hmph. Some benchmark.
“For My thoughts are not your thoughts,
Nor are your ways My ways,” says the Lord.
“For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
So are My ways higher than your ways,
And My thoughts than your thoughts.”
- Isaiah 55:8-9
Nor are your ways My ways,” says the Lord.
“For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
So are My ways higher than your ways,
And My thoughts than your thoughts.”
- Isaiah 55:8-9
My higher self - who peeks down at me through the morass of rumination and expectation I surround myself with - knows there is a higher wisdom to all this.
She knows that I needed to crave the wellness more deeply than I have been.
She knows I needed to seek guidance from higher quality sources than I have been.
So I made it happen.
The craving and the seeking are happening from a wheelchair (for at least another 6 weeks).
That is God's plan.
Seek and you shall find.
Crave and you shall be satisfied.
But the quality of the seeking and the craving determine the quality of the finding and the sating.
I've upped my quality.
My life is taking one of the most positive turns it's ever taken, even more so than in 2006 when I had the surgery.
I'm taking my health to a higher level.
I feel I'm doing it the right way this time.
I wake up in the morning and make my bed.
That's huge, HUGE!
I haven't made my bed since....come to think of it I never made my bed.
Not ever.
As a kid I wasn't allowed to make my own bed because, according to my mother, I wouldn't do it right.
When I was a teenager I left the bed unmade for spite.
When I moved to my own apartment I never made my bed.
Why would I?
I was the only one who was ever in my room.
Who cared if I had an unmade bed?
That unmade-bed habit stayed with me for the past 21 years.
My bed stayed unmade until last Wednesday, May 27th when I began the first phase of my new life habits.
In order to do my morning exercises, my bed needs to be made.
So I've been making my bed.
Nothing fancy.
I'm on crutches when I'm in my apartment so there's no tucking or bouncing a quarter on the taught sheets.
But it's a made bed that people and cats can sit upon.
I like it.
I like the Lisa who makes her bed.
She's cool.
I'm cool.
None of this would be happening the way it's happening if I had not hit rock bottom (again) with this ruptured tendon in my knee.
Thank God I hurt my knee.
*Lisa's Video Pick of the Day*
The Fair is coming!
The Fair is coming!
Here's my favorite attraction.
The sleazy, weird, freaky, cool, old-timey
classic World of Wonders Sideshow with the veteran carny
Ward Hall.
click here or click below
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