lil' anchor girl

Moving around doing small acts of self-care helped me yesterday.

Getting a little blood flowing.
Getting some chi flowing.
Freeing up space,
uncluttering,
cleaning a bit,
actively caring for the me who is me,
helped me be in less of a funk.

Small moves.

A small move like wiping up something crusty off the floor.
Washing the big cooking-pot.
Throwing out old food from the fridge.
Taking out the garbage.
Scrubbing the toilet.
Picking clothes up off the floor.
Taking my vitamins.
Moving old coffee mugs from the computer area over to the sink to be washed.
Washing the coffee mugs.

Little things mean A LOT when I'm in a funk.

I'm sure I'm not the only one for whom this is true.

Getting to the big things (like getting back to my fabulously expensive rec center/gym on a regular basis) sometimes requires small steps.

Little moves to build on.

Small bounces that lead to super-high bounces.

Ache-y self-esteem needing little strokes of love in order to get stoked into a big enough fire to propel the engine that is me.

One small move at a time,
like one tiny one-foot-in-front-0f-the-other step at a time,
gets us someplace...eventually.
We don' t always have to take giant gazelle leaps to get someplace.

I know how hard it is to get out of a depressive funk.
I know how hard it is to break the cycle of
funk
mope
mope
funk.

I'm learning that small moves can make a positive difference.

The perfectionistic, critical part of my mind tells me:
not enough
you should be
you're lazy
get back to the gym
you're just being stubborn
what's the matter with you
go lose weight now now now
you need to make a grand sweeping commitment and stick to it or you're nothing!

The little Lisa inside me who needs encouragement,
coddling,
reassurance,
kindness and stroking
hides out when she hears that voice.

She's a powerful little thing, like at tiny anchor that gets caught on the coral reef and keeps the giant ship from moving.

I need to help her now.
I need to be good to her now, especially.
I need to polish my little anchor girl.

As I and many of my astute readers have pointed out, we store more than calories in our fat.
Emotions get stored there.
Negative energies are stored in fat to hold them away from our inner core, our organs, our moving parts.

What happens when we stir it up and try to lose it?
Burn it?
Use it?
The emotions present themselves.
The karma needs to be dealt with.

I have some old, raw, irritated, deep hurts getting exposed right now.

This Halfway to Skinny thing is no joke.

I need some major self-soothing to get through these next few months.
I have a major job search to create and execute.
I have some major paperwork and legal stuff to handle.
I have a new semester approaching.
A book to write.
A body to tend to.
A mind to fix.
A heart to heal.

The funky,
mopey,
why bother,
who cares,
apathetic,
can't-do-it
feelings
are the ways my inner Lisa,
the tender one,
the vulnerable, needy one,
cries out
meepishly
for love and attention.

Help me.
Polish me.
Love me, please.

Sometimes all she needs are some small moves to make her feel OK.


*Lisa's Video Pick of the Day*
Addiction to overeating or undereating is the same:
self-destructive.
The self-punishing behavior hurts.
Self-soothing is so so so so necessary in recovery.
Self-soothing with positive action rather than addiction-behavior is so so so so important.
It helps to know I'm not alone.
It helps to know this head-trip of trying to get well is hard for all of us.
It helps to let-in a little hope from others.
click here or click below